There’s always something to do at work. Apart from the vital work of writing this blog and answering emails, paramedics have daily equipment checks and regularly train the ambulance drivers and army personnel in first aid. When available we also help out on the ward and assist the GP’s at Saturday morning clinics. In the event of an off-base mass casualty incident we run the triage and transport operation and then assist doctors in resuscitation at the hospital. Apart from all of this there is also the actual job we are primarily here to do – that of aero medical evacuations (AME’s). These, by their very nature are unpredictable. In the first fortnight I was here there wasn’t one, yet the week before I arrived the paramedic I took over from had done five. There are on average a couple a week.
Last week I finally got to earn my money doing what I’m here for, almost. A PNG soldier was sick with a fever near Avu Avu on the southern coast of Guadalcanal. Initial reports suggested he couldn’t walk, although as is common with these things the reports were sketchy and third hand. Whenever someone has a fever Malaria and Dengue have to be considered and so an AME was ordered. My drivers and I loaded the Ambulance with the necessary equipment (probably about 80kg worth of stuff) and headed out of the base in the required 5 minutes to the airport which is just down the road.
It had been raining on and off all day. This was good because it was a little cooler than normal and wearing a nomex flight suit in this weather is akin to sitting in an oven, and that’s before you get in a hot helicopter. It didn’t bode well for the flight though. The pilot, an irritable old ex-army pilot met us with,
“#!@* me! what %&@* head thought this *%#$ was ^%!!ing funny?” The crewman translated this as,
“The Weathercoast of Guadalcanal got its name for a good reason and the weather will only deteriorate as we approach it. Crashing this helicopter isn’t worth retrieving one soldier this afternoon so we may well only get halfway there. What ‘s more these people are still quite traumatised having been at the centre of some of the most horrific atrocities during the “tensions” and are consequently not always the friendliest, so we would rather not put down uninvited.”

Having loaded the helicopter (a Bell 412) and completed pre-flight checks (which to the pilot’s credit were performed calmly and very thoroughly), we took off. It struck me at the time that if the rain is coming in the pilot’s open window despite something like 2 tonnes of downdraft going past its getting quite heavy. Cloud cover on the 2000 meter high mountain range running down the spine of Guadalcanal meant traversing the island was out from the start so we began a clockwise coastal route at about 1000ft above the beach.

The sky got darker and darker and the rain heavier still. Sunset is around 6.30 throughout the year here but at 3pm none of us needed our sunnies on. Though visibility was down to about 1500m the views of little villages on the coast were fantastic. Not a kilometre went by without a river disgorging its contents into the sea. The jungle was thick right to the water’s edge in most places with the only little clearings generally occupied by a leafhaus or two (Pidgin not German).
As we approached the eastern tip of Guadalcanal a black wall of weather could be seen approaching through the mist. The pilot, whose nickname on the back of his helmet was Bad Santa, calmly announced,

“"#!$ this &%$!"
and with that banked the helicopter in a steep turn through 180 degrees. The weather slowly seemed to be catching us despite our 110 knot airspeed and the sky got darker and darker. As the visibility reduced so did our altitude until we were just clearing the tallest palm trees on the beach. The crewman had been calling out potential landing sites every couple of minutes on the way out which was about as often as we saw them. He was now identifying them about every 30 seconds, most of which looked to me more like the size of a front lawn or a not-so-steep bit of beach.

Our flight back seemed, and probably was, a lot faster than on the way out. We were all fairly wet by the time we landed – equal parts sweat and rain. No sooner had the rotors stopped than the full force of the weather front hit and I have to say I now have complete faith in Bad Santa’s judgement.

It turned out the PNG soldier had a case of what is known here as man-flu, a debilitating illness that is otherwise known as the snuffles. Further assessment resulted in no AME and the administration of a couple of panadol.